Thursday, January 28, 2010

We're Number One!

OK fine, we're not #1, but we are just 67 miles or an hour drive from the #1 Beer Store

(another article on the subject)

It's just a hair north of us in Youngstown, Ohio, but it might as well be in Pittsburgh.  Youngstown, for a long time now has been asymilated into Southwestern PA.  It's as much a part of Pittsburgh as Cranberry or Uniontown or WashPA.  In my travels I've actually met other people who have said they were from Pittsburgh, and when I ask them what part, they respond "Youngstown."  I even have a coworker who commutes every day to work from Youngstown to Monroeville.

Youngstown and Steubenville are like two bastard cities Ohio never really wanted.  Youngstown had mob problems and Steubenville just kind of sucked.  And don't let Steubenville try to fool you otherwise.  They're like the scrawny, hairlipped, humbacked orphan that nobody ever wanted to adopt. 

Years ago, when Pittsburgh was drawing up the official papers to adopt Youngstown, Ohio tried to pawn off Steubenville on us at the same time.  "It's a package deal.  The two get along so well and we'd hate to separate the two of them."

Fortunately Sophie Masloff was too smart for such a ploy.  So we Pittsburghers took Youngstown under our wing as one of our own, and it's been a pleasant relationship ever since.  Of course that hasn't stopped Steubenville from attempting to get it's parasitic little tentacles on Pittsburgh.  They broke free from Ohio about 10 years ago and started calling themselves, and all of Jefferson County Ohio, "The Burb of the Burg."

Yes, they are that Ghetto.  True, at only 36 miles away from Downtown Pittsburgh, they are almost twice as close as Youngstown.  But just because the kitchen sink is twice as close as the toilet to the living room doesn't mean you use it instead.  Twice as close?  Is that even proper english?   See, Steubenville sucks so much donkey balls, they are only worth insulting with gramatically incorrect idioms.

Now that I've gotten that little tirade off my chest, wasn't there something about alcohol I was supposed to be talking about.  Yes, back to Youngstown and the Number 1 Beer Store in the World, Vintage Estate Wine and Beer.  That's right.  They are the number one beer retailer in the World according to's 2010 awards. At over 800 craft beers and 1000 plus types of wine, there is little in my mind to deter me from just driving up there in the middle of this snow storm we are in and setting up my own little tent city in their parking lot.  I'll bring the kielbasa and the carcoal grill and will simply just venture into the store if I need more to drink or to use the bathroom.  That is unless there is a sink that's close by.

Now that I've heard of the place, I'm sure I'll be making my way up there at some point to sample their selection.  If you're in the area in late April, the store plans on hosting a massive beer festival called The Big Tap In.  I may just have to go.

And the owners live in New Castle, PA, so yinz can consider the as locals as well.

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